Bored

San Jose, CA - This shouldn't technically be a post since I'm back stateside, but the second I landed and heard people talking around me (sans cute Aussie accent), I couldn't help but think to myself: "Well, this is boring."

Anyways, thanks to the two people who actually read this blog (my mom being one of them...). I had a wonderful trip and have a newfound love and appreciation for Australia and, of course, those awesome Aussies. Can't wait to go back!

Holy sheet!

Melbourne - Today's my last day in Oz. I can already anticipate the tears I'll shed on the plane. Some photos of the last leg of my trip:


Holy sheet! Trip's almost over.


You can order Coke and shit at BBNT (burger/taco joint)


Melbourne at night


Peter, our adorable guide at Melbourne Cricket Ground (MCG)


Federation Square


Great Ocean Road


Twelve Apostles


What's left of London Bridge. Funny story about the collapse of the bridge here. (It involves infidelity!)


Feeding wallabies :)


These guys are CUTE


Rainbow over Phillip Island


Watch out for the penguins. They're squishy.


In the bathroom (yes, the bathroom) at the historic Hotel Windsor, where the king stayed


Segue back home

Melbourne - This is what happens when you go to bars on a Wednesday afternoon in Melbourne:

Judy: (takes photo of her latte, Lord knows why. She does this a lot.)
British bloke at our table: Did you just take a photo of your coffee? That is the most bizarre thing I've ever seen.

(10 minutes go by, during which he and his friend, and Judy and I have separate conversations at our respective ends of the table)

British bloke: Do you always do that? Do you have some sort of collection? I should take photographs of people taking photographs of their coffee and put it on a website, http://www.weirdbastards.com/ (not an actual website...that I know of).


Omg, I am on the floor.

Errr

Melbourne...or is it Shanghai? - I am seriously out of it. Twice today, I genuinely thought for a split second that I was in Shanghai. In my defense, the first time, I was drinking boba in a Chinese cafe, watching Chinese music videos and thumbing through Chinese fashion rags. I have no reasonable explanation for the second time.

Shroom

Melbourne - I just met an Aussie in the hostel elevator who's getting a mushroom tattoo because he really likes Super Mario Bros. Oh boy.

(See mushroom here.)

Succinctness

Melbourne - I looked up synonyms for "succinctness" on dictionary.com, and the first ad that pops up is "1 Rule of a Flat Stomach: Cut down 9 pounds of stomach fat every 11 days obeying this 1 rule." One rule?! Succinct indeed.

Snippets:

• Joe Biden. Unrelated to being Down Undah, but exciting, no?
• Tried absinthe here
• Learned about Ned Kelly, whose modern-day business card would say, simply, "Badass."
• Legit boba
• Semi-clear skies
• Hippie vintage stuff (note the usage of the very descriptive term, "stuff")
• Countless embarrassing moments not worth mentioning...

Coming up:

• Great Ocean Road
• Penguins!
• Going back home :(

Melbourne, VIC, Australia - It's cold and rainy. Shit.

Aqua adventures

Sydney - Sydney Aquarium 1, Monterey Bay Aquarium 0.


Stonefish


Turtle


Roo

Inappropriate humor (like it's ever stopped me before)

Sydney - Somebody tell me this VooDoo Baby does not look like a member of the KKK.

Seriously, convince me.

It's all about the wordplay

Sydney - [Any Jason Mraz (Mr. A to Z) fans?] As you probably know, I am easily tickled by wordplay. This comes in handy on long plane rides, when newspaper headlines like "Phelps: Eight is Enough" will set me off on a fit of chuckles that will last me through the first round of pretzels, easy. So imagine my glee when I stumbled across the following signs:


Thai Me Up


Thai Foon


Sequins of Events


Sweet Art

And my personal favorite:

Sea life as you've never seen it


Sea life. Wahaha! Sea life! Oh, my sides. Or, as this package of seaweed crackers supporting clown doctors would say, "HA..HA..HA."

Sydney - Traipsing around Bondi Beach has finally pushed my trusty Converses past their limit. I think it's time, after 8 long years, to Chuck 'em.


Bondi Beach around dusk


Bondi Beach around dusk, and then proof that I was actually there to see it


My poor Chucks

Sydney, NSW, Australia - I am food comatose and disoriented in Sydney. But I love it, and Judy is here!


Sydney Opera House

Cute overload

Brisbane - Two weeks into my trip, I still can't get over how cute Aussie people sound when they talk. Especially when they say things that are already inherently adorable, like "Hey love," or "Hey darlin." I might be in trouble.

I'm about to embark on a 17-hour bus ride. Sydney, here I come!

Brisbane, QLD, Australia - It seems I've inadvertently booked myself into a hostel (sorry, backpacker) smack in the middle of Chinatown. Does this mean what I think it means? Boba?

(edit)

Okay, I am flipping OUT. Not only do I find dozens (DOZENS!) Chinese restaurants literally 10 feet away from my hostel that sell boba, but I also walk into a Chinese supermarket and hear - get ready - JAY CHOU. For Jay fans, it was his 2005 November's Chopin (十一月的萧邦) album, and I walked in to catch the ending notes of Black Sweater (黑色毛衣) and the beginning of Coral Sea (珊瑚海). I was so excited, I bought myself pineapple cake - the individually wrapped square stuff. Chinese people know what I'm talking about. Then I scampered back here to blog about it. Errrrr loser. (In my defense, I was only 10 feet away from my hostel.) But seriously, if you know me but at all, you can understand my utter euphoria. And in case you don't know me too well, here's a rough breakdown:

Boba + Jay Chou + pineapple cake + cute old Chinese couple (see Bobalicious for details) = HELLA HAPPY CAT.

I love Brisbane! Okay, no more computer. Time for real-life people!


Brisbane Chinatown


POCKY


Hello Panda


Last, but not least, BOBA

Walking the line

After several days of driving on the left side of the road (following 23 years of doing just the opposite), my brain is confused about which side is actually the right one. (Ha.) I usually compromise and go somewhere in the center.

Photo orgy

Today's downtime day. No 14-hour bus rides. So:


Trinity Beach, north of Cairns


That's Capt. Doug on The Falla


Falla at sunset, after a reef snorkel


Clouds above rainforest, en route to Kuranda


KANGAROOS


Crocs


Real crocs


Sleeping koala :]


Michael Scott, artist?


My kayak in Horseshoe Bay, Maggie Island

Pause

Hervey Bay, AUS - Turns out I'm stuck in Hervey (pronounced "Harvey") Bay for a day longer than I planned since I can't hop onto a Fraser Island tour today. But ya know, with Fraser Island being the world's largest sand island and all, I think it's worth the delay, no? It'll be nice to have a day to do laundry, finally. I've been nearing my clean dry towel threshold for longer than I'd like to admit...

There's a puppy and a kitty at my hostel here and they appear to be best friends. :]

The reef, pt. 2

Airlie Beach/Whitsundays, AUS - Jetted around the Whitsunday Islands today, snorkeled the reef, hung out with Canadians and met an Aborigine New Zealander who has 25 siblings, none of whom have ever visited the doctor, "Because nigh-chure keeps ya healthy, aye mate."



Whitehaven Beach, Whitsunday Islands


The sand here is silica, which is really really fine and can polish silver!


Kayaking in Horseshoe Bay (Maggie Island). This adventure nearly killed my camera and left me in tears on the beach. True story. Details later.

Relief, elation

Btw, I FOUND BOBA.

Things I've become really good at doing fast:

1. Showering
2. Making sandwiches
3. Slapping away mosquitoes (but not fast enough)
4. Going on and offline
5. Peacing out on buses
6. Getting charmed by Australian men who sound like Russell Crowe. Oops.
   

Thingz that r spelled funnie heer

1. Manouvre (maneuver)
2. Tore (tour guide)
3. Stinger (jellyfish)
4. Rubbish (garbage)
5. Crape (crepe)
6. Concession (discount)
7. Backpacker (hostel)
8. Tyre (tire)
9. Inquest (investigation - yes, I've been reading the papers here)
10. Transit centre/mall (bus stop)

Okay, so some of these are obviously more than just spelling variations, but you get the picture.

Effing buggers

I'm looking at my legs and counting 8 new mosquito bites. On my legs alone. In one night! WTF MATE.

Hot poo and Hogan

Gotcha at the title, eh?

Re: Hot poo
"Make sure you catch the last train back, or else you'll be in hot poo."
-Hostel owner Dave, on getting back to Cairns (obviously)

Re: Hogan
Hogan is a 4-year-old koala I hugged today in Kuranda, a rainforest village 27 km north of Cairns. He's got claws, tufts of fur by his ears, and is the cutest thing I've ever hugged that didn't maul my face (i.e. my cat when she was still a kitten and not yet Psycho-feline).

THE REEF

Today I jumped off the side of a 50-year-old wooden ship to swim around with Nemo fish, a stingray and a 3-foot turtle. Oh, and lots and lots of coral. Did you know you can see the Great Barrier Reef from the MOON? Anyways, I subsequently (simultaneously?) I snorted about 5 gallons of the Pacific Ocean through my snorkel, watched a whale do a flip, chortled through Captain Doug's rendition of what Australian people do when unemployed (say "Argggg" and drink boxed wine called Goon), and met a crazy Scotsman named Scott. True story.

Amending my plans for a week in Brisbane. I think I might do a car share with folks heading south along the coast, and stop at Arlie Beach and Fraser Island instead.